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doilie, doileys, dolly - people misspell it and mispronounce it. I just hang out to see where they're headed. sure enough they're not talking about dolls. they just haven't heard the word in a long time and aren't really sure.

as I was signing up for the Exotic Erotic Ball last month, David Stay on the other end of the line (who gave me permission to use his real name) asked me what kind of art I did.

Me: well, I ... uh ... make erotic doilies.
He: ... doilies, eh? ... how do you spell that? in all my years of producing this show I don't think I've ever had to type that word.

second to having my portrait painted with a penis ... by a penis? ... was catching gazes from the passersby while fondling my antimacassar (antimacassar in use as an antimacassar here and here):

as the crowds slowly passed my table, I would scan their eyes while rubbing my doily up and down. often enough I got my favorite response when someone just busted out laughing. a woman or a man ... they'd nudge their partner to take a look. some did this privately and I pretended not to see. still others saw me and quickly averted my gaze. this totally surprised me at this venue. my booth mates and neighbors had various theories about this, some about how the response could've been so visceral and automatic that the viewer wasn't prepared for it. and it was being elicited by the use of a ... a doily?? I dunno. your guess? as soon as I sensed someone might be uncomfortable, I'd go on to find another set of eyes, searching for that lovely guffaw. if there is a purpose to my life these days, it is to give guffaws, get guffaws, to share in the big guffaw!

Photo courtesy of Richard ChauDavis, my booth neighbor for this event

Or I could call this post - Pricasso meets When Doilies go Bad.

I, Laura Mappin, showed my wares (actually not like you're thinking but hey, I'll leave it) at this year's Exotic Erotic Art Festival and Ball. I had the most fun when Pricasso painted my portrait. what did he use for a brush? yup. and what did I hold with me in the portrait? take a look ~~~

before we begin
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ya know, it sure looked like it would be uncomfortable but he swore it was not and I saw him paint for two days in a row. ok then ...
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am i really here sitting for this? umm, i think i asked for it.
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picture comes to life
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me with doily
and backdrop
at this special painting sitting ...
... all too confusing
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now I can't draw or paint even remotely this representatively with any appendage I own. can you?
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butt painting. I now have his butt prints forever. on the same page as his cock tip print! see his signature below? he does all the letters with a brush but the last letter is ... an ... O. hilarious!
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this whole thing was hilarious the whole way through! I'm laughing now just looking at these pics again.

Tim was fun to meet, a nice guy, graciously answering everyone's questions he's heard so many times before - does it hurt? do you cover it while painting? use any salve? acrylics, right? how do you keep it clean? does stuff get up in there? does it still work? you'll have to see him for the answers.

I have to say I thought I'd be uncomfortable at this event but given my product line, I had to check it out. years ago I wrote on my baubo roars blog about suggesting we have one day a year when it's legal to go around naked, you know, where we all could sit on our front porches naked if we wanted to and not get arrested. It's just because we have these bodies. yes, it's a fact - news flash just in - we all have these fleshy bodies with various erogenous zones. and we do so much to hide that fact, it seems to me. but I thought there'd be groping and a lot of sleaze at this event. and I found there wasn't. one guy did start chatting me up and I told him I wasn't interested and he smiled and left. it was that easy.

now I wonder who you are as the reader of this post. if you've gone to this event before, you're probably thinking finally, I get it. or if you're of the kind who has your own view of what a perfect world would be like and this does not fit, you're probably thinking I just fell over the edge.

I cannot tell you I was comfortable with everything I saw. I was not. I did not like seeing older fully clothed men with bad posture walking around by themselves taking pictures with telephotos. very slimy, man. then there were the groups of younger guys wearing at least three layers of clothing (just to be sure?) walking around gawking. well, hopefully they grow out of it but I have no hope for the older solo men.

I did like being around people who were naked to the level of their own choosing, costumed by choice. I liked seeing men asking women (it usually went this direction) if they could take their picture. I also liked that some women said no and the men respected this. That kind of behavior in any environment is superb.
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Many thanks to my good friend Gary for this series of photos.